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Things They Don’t Tell You is a children’s online book of unspoken truths, a guide to life if you like, with revelations about TV, ugly people and how tall people only date each other. Charming, funny and very true.

C4s Phil Bostwick gets amongst it at a celebrity party in Auckland and licks a middle-aged man’s nipple, who is a dead ringer for Craig Norgate. Moving pictures are so much better than the stills, because you can really see how pissed people are.

Great wedding pictures: There’s nothing worse than posed, prissy wedding photos on windswept beaches with everyone trying to look as beautiful/handsome as possible… This however, is a brilliant idea. Give your guests a few drinks and a table of props and tell them to get their picture taken during the evening — the result is fun, unpretentious pictures.

Martin Bashir — famous for interviewing Princess Diana and Michael Jackson — made some horny middle-aged man comments at a function recently. Yucky.

Picture this: This slideshow of the the London home of director Roland Emmerich (10,000 BC and Independence Day) includes a taxidermy zebra, a coffee table made from an Iraqi missile and a diorama of the John F. Kennedy assassination. See it here.

Get Your War On was the hugely popular comic strip using clip art drawn office workers discussing the War on Terror. Now it’s been made into an animated series. First clip covers the “terrorist watchlist”, which according to one worker, has more than a million people on it, mostly due to “data entry kerfuffles”. Watch it here.

Teaching English in Japan is awesome and sometimes hilarious.

Video: The best sex I ever had … a geeky teenage girl makes up what she imagines this to be…